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Leaving the Metro Station

Thinking of leaving?

It is up to you to decide whether you are ready to leave. Putting distance between yourself and an abusive partner can often be the best way to diffuse a situation, but leaving may present risks and is often the most dangerous time in an abusive relationship.

 

Having a safety plan empowers you to make wise decisions and minimizes the chance of getting hurt. A safety plan is a personalized, practical plan that includes ways to remain safe while in a relationship, planning to leave, or after you leave. Safety planning involves how to cope with emotions, tell friends and family about the abuse, take legal action, among others. Follow these tips below when developing your safety plan.

 

If you need any assistance whatsoever please call us and our team can help get you started with a safety plan specific to your needs and priorities. 

De Colores Community Based Team:(623) 247-0464 Option #3

Cell Phone Safety

  • Put a passcode on your phone​

  • Turn off location sharing 

  • Turn off Bluetooth 

  • Review the apps you have downloaded

  • Change passwords to accounts

  • Use a virtual phone number (i.e. Google Voice)

  • Try not to store sensitive information on your phone

leaving an abusive relationship

  • Keep any evidence of physical abuse (i.e pictures)

  • Keep a journal of all incidences, noting dates, events and threats made.

  • Know where you can go to get help.

  • Tell someone what is happening to you.

  • If you are injured, go to a doctor or an emergency room and report what happened to you.

  • Identify a safe place for children (i.e. their room or a friend’s house).

  • Contact your local shelter and find out about laws and other resources. WomensLaw.org has state by state legal information.

  • Acquire job skills or take courses at a community college as you can.

  • Try to set money aside or ask friends or family members to hold money for you.

leaving an abusive home

  • Share your plan to leave with a safe person (i.e family member, friend, faith leader, or advocate)

  • Pack a bag for you and your children in advance.

  • Keep bag in a safe place (trunk of a car or a friend’s home). 

  • Hide a disposable phone in a discreet location (i.e your car or purse)

  • Turn off the GPS tracker on your cell phone before leaving home.

  • Collect all of your personal documents:

    • Birth certificates for yourself and your children;

    • Social security cards;

    • Medical and immunization records;

    • Driver’s license;

    • Passports;

    • Financial information, including copies of bank statements and credit card statements; and

    • Prescription medication for you and your children 

Social Media Safety

  • Don't respond to harassing/abusive comments

  • Keep a record of all harassing messages & posts

  • Report inappropriate behavior

  • Only post things you what the public to see

  • Be protective of your personal information

  • Keep your passwords private.  

Emotional Safety planning

It is important to also consider your emotional safety along with your physical safety when planning on leaving an abusive relationship. Emotional safety is about developing a personalized plan that helps you feel accepting of your emotions and decisions when dealing with abuse. 

  • ​Seek Out Supportive People: Such as a trusted friend or family member can help create a calm atmosphere to think through difficult situations and allow for you to discuss potential options.

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  • Identify and Work Towards Achievable Goals: An achievable goal might be calling a local resource and seeing what services are available in your area, or talking to one of our advocates at De Colores.  

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  • Create a Peaceful Space for Yourself: Designating a physical place where your mind can relax and feel safe can be good option when working through difficult emotions that can arise when dealing with abuse. 

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  • Remind Yourself of Your Great Value: You are important and special, and recognizing and reminding yourself of this reality is so beneficial for your emotional health. It is never your fault when someone chooses to be abusive to you.

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  • Remember That You Deserve to Be Kind to Yourself: Taking time to practice self-care every day, even if it is only for a few minutes, really creates space for peace and emotional safety. 

Before leaving an abusive relationship or home, call us to speak with a trained advocate about safety planning:

623-247-0464 Option #3

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